"So this is the new year, and I don't feel any different."
-Death Cab for Cutie, The New Year
I'm somewhat disappointed that I didn't have a post for October because then I would have at least been posting once a month since I started this thing. Oh well, new year, new start. Tomorrow marks the beginning of 2011, and I still can't believe it's been 11 years since the big Y2K scare. Ridiculous, right?
I have to tell you, I struggled with publishing all these posts again. I had them hidden for the last few months because I always end up critiquing the way I sound when I look back and read them again. I decided it's time to let that go.
I just realized how unfitting that quote up top is for the actual tone I plan on having for this post. It just made me nostalgic because I remember driving in my best friend's car in high school listening to that song as we rang in 2005. You want to know what embarrassing shenanigans we were up to that night? We were driving past a party where this guy I had a monster crush on at the time was hanging out. What did we think we were going to do if he saw us driving by? Act nonchalant and say something like, "Oh, fancy seeing you here! We were just in the neighborhood...marry me?" Oh to be 17 and stalk guys who never deserved your affections in the first place.
It's scary to me that I was up to such nonsense only six measly years ago. Oh well, it was fun at the time. My life is much more uneventful these days, but I have to admit I like it that way. The memories are enough for me.
So, the real reason I think I started posting is to list a few things I plan on changing. Yes, I know everyone does this. I know it's uber cliche. But I don't care. I want to have a more carefree attitude this year and every year after it. So bear with me.
[Actually, scratch that. I wrote out a list of five things and then just deleted it. Man oh man, were my resolutions ever boring.]
I think I just want to have one resolution for the whole year. I'd been tossing ideas around in my head, but this is the best thing I've been able to come up with so far. All of the resolutions I listed before deleting them were really self-centered. Yes, we could debate for hours about how totally and completely genuendo it is to do things for others and think it's selfless when it's really self-serving because it makes you feel good. However, at least it's one small step closer to being focused on others rather than blatantly focusing on myself. So let it go. I'm trying.
My One and Only Resolution for 2011:
Each week, I resolve to pick one person and do something, whether anonymously or not, to show them that they mean something to people in this world. Heck, there are so many people flooding into my mind right now that I think I may even make it two or three people some weeks. By the end of the year, at least 52 more people will feel special or appreciated. That still wouldn't be enough, but it's better than nothing, I suppose.
The main guideline for the whole thing is that whatever I do for them has to be well-thought-out and geared toward that specific person and their interests. I have this friend, Pam, who I've known since first grade. She gives the most personal, thoughtful gifts of anyone I've ever known, and she is my inspiration for the way I'll be showing people they matter.
Also, my mother-in-law gave all of us gratitude journals for Christmas because she thinks it's an important thing to focus on, especially in times like now with the economy looking somewhat bleak. She is my inspiration for focusing on the positive things that I'm thankful for rather than the negative things in life.
This has been the most helter-skelter post I've written thus far. I sure am out of practice. I'll be posting more often, so hopefully my thoughts will become more coherent as time goes on. Hopefully.
Happy New Year, everyone!